Off the bat it sounds pretty logical, that craft knowledge can save your bacon on many an occasion, but because we like to be blunt about stuff, we’ve got 5 scenarios for you that clearly benefit from a craft clever oke.
1. Be a bottle store super hero
You’re at the craft beer fridge in your favourite bottle store. To your right is a young man looking hopelessly lost. Eventually he asks you what he should try – time to shine. Rather than shock his palate with a massive IPA, you tell him to get a lager, a pilsner, a pale ale and a weiss. The first two are great because they’re close to his regular commercial lager. The second two are awesome because they’re the start of his journey into the tasty world of ales. He leaves with four awesome beers and a little more confidence. You leave wondering whether or not you’d look good in a cape.
2. Be a beer defender
You’re at a dinner party and there’s a guy waxing lyrical about how wine is more complex than beer. He asks for your opinion and after a slow sip of your IPA you oblige. You explain that beer is made of barley, hops, yeast and water – that’s two more ingredients than wine. Each has its own terroir (that’s wine speak for the environmental conditions). You explain that with these four ingredients you can make two styles of beer: lagers and ales – much like red and white. And within these styles you get over a hundred types of beers. In conclusion you tell him that in your opinion, beer is as complex if not more than wine – class dismissed.
3. Ace that blind date
You’re on a blind date and she’s asks you to surprise her with a drink from the bar. You ask if there’s anything she doesn’t drink and she tells you beer – challenge accepted. You return to the table with a red looking beverage in a short glass with ice. She takes one sip and she’s completely intoxicated by the cherry and berry aromas coming off the drink. She swears it’s one of the best things she’s ever tasted and asks you what it is. You come clean and tell her it’s actually a beer. A Belgian fruit ale. She’s impressed. You’re chuffed. Chalk one up for beer.
4. Earn beery points
You’re at the annual work lunch and you’re seated right next to the big boss. You’re chatting about beer and he tells you he’d love to get into this whole craft beer thing, but he doesn’t know where to start. You tell him that you know a thing or two and suggest an impromptu beer tasting for the employees. Fast forward two hours later and you’re the craft beer rockstar of the table. You’ve taken tastebuds from South Africa to Europe and America. You’ve converted more than half the table to craft, and you could swear that the cute girl from accounting just winked at you. Job done.
5. Be a craft beer myth buster
You’re standing around at a braai with a couple of new acquaintances. The beers are flowing and it’s a mix between craft and commercial. The conversation soon turns to beer and one fellow pipes up that he doesn’t drink craft. You ask why and he says that craft beer gives you a bigger hangover. You tell him you don’t entirely agree, because craft beer has the exact same ingredients as commercial beer. You ask him what he was drinking and he tells you IPA. It’s then that the penny drops. You explain that IPAs are way higher in alcohol than your average lager. He laughs, you laugh and then you offer him an IPA.
That’s just 5 scenarios. With a monthly subscription to craft beer, that just happens to come with a free Introduction to Craft course that will change your life, you’ll be able to use craft your way out of pretty much any challenge in life.
We’d put our best beer on that.